Are you overly emotional or do you have ptsd from a relationship?

Have you been in a manipulative, toxic, abusive relationship? Did you know you can have Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) from the abuse? Did you also know the abuser and others can label you as being “overly emotional” to further invalidate, confuse, and traumatize you. In this article I’d like to discuss the difference between what is “overly emotional” and what is PTSD so you can be aware of what you are actually experiencing and to begin the process of allowing yourself some space to heal without feeling your appropriate emotions should be somehow shut down.

Emotions are a Normal Response to the Situation!!

Let’s first talk about normal emotions so we can understand not so normal emotions and if you have them. So first of all…it is normal to be scared when something scary happens like a sudden loud noise, or someone jumps out and scares you, or you are fearful of something happening that would be devastating to you or someone you care about. It is normal to feel sad when something sad happens like when someone hurts your feelings or you are feeling lonely or your pet passes away or when you feel let down by someone who didn’t keep a promise. It is normal to feel mistrustful of someone who is acting shady or who has lied to you. These are all examples of normal emotions to stressful situations. Therefore, you would not be acting overly emotional if you experience these emotions in these situations. It is normal to have emotions in response to hurtful situations, especially those involving your partner, who should be the one most supportive of your expression of emotions, and trying to do the least harm to you emotionally.

Trauma as a Result from an Abusive Relationship

What if you are in an abusive relationship where your partner has manipulated, lied, heated, confused, gaslighted, perhaps abused you emotionally, physically, sexually, financially, spiritually, etc.? What if you now have symptoms such as hypervigilance, nightmares, anxiety, depression, feeling like you have to walk on eggshells around them and now possibly others, you have an exaggerated startle response, feel incapable of making decisions, do not trust others, including yourself, have difficulty sleeping, eating, gain or lose weight, are irritable, want to isolate yourself?

What can happen when you are in a manipulative, toxic, abusive relationship is you can begin to have emotions that are normal as a result of what you are or have experienced. Let me say that again…it is normal that you will have emotions in response to abuse. These emotions may be the symptoms of PTSD which can result from being in an abusive relationship.

How Do I Know If I’m Being Overly Emotional Then?

If you are in an abusive, manipulative, toxic relationship and are experiencing anger, irritability, jealously, rage, sadness, anxiety, depression, loneliness, and any other host of emotions, this is not abnormal. It is to be expected in response to the situation. What tends to happen though is an abusive partner will take your emotional responses and try to manipulate you further by saying you are being “overly emotional” especially if you are calling out their mistreatment of you. You aren’t. You are acting entirely appropriate based on what the situation is.

For further reading and understanding please check out Out of the FOG: Moving From Confusion to Clarity After Narcissistic Abuse my Dana Morningstar. Ms. Morningstar describes this concept to well throughout her book. You can buy it here.